no one’s gonna love you if you can’t do the rumba.

HELLO! been a long time, dear reader. hope you didn’t forget about me. i didn’t forget about you. i never could. i’ve just been terribly busy with the end of junior year, but now IT’S OVER. thank you god/jesus/allah/cory monteith (because i basically worship him like a god, okay?). summer is here, and i couldn’t be more excited. here’s to more blogging. 

i. it’s been about two months since i posted something, and oddly enough, the last time i posted, it was the night before i took the act for the second time. guess who is taking it for the third time tomorrow? me. that’s right. funny how life works like that. 

majorly nervous for tomorrow, but i can totally do this. i can TOTALLY do this. I CAN TOTALLY DO THIS. my mom told me today that when i say something, it usually becomes a little self-fulfilling prophecy, and i’ve been thinking positively for months. i got this. 

it’s all about positive thoughts. i got this. 

ii. i’m going to be a senior. i’m sorry, but wasn’t freshman year, like, five seconds ago?! i haven’t wrapped my head around all of this yet, but i ordered my senior shirt the other day that states “we’re the c14ss they warned you about”, which i think is very funny. i’ll let you know when it hits me. 

iii. GOODBYE PRECAL, YOU DEVIL MATH YOU. 

iv. this summer, i think i have three goals: read a lot, be productive, be more organized. so, if anyone has any summer reading recs, i’d love to hear them. i really want to broaden my reading horizons, so i think i’ll read somethings that i wouldn’t normally pick up. i hope i’ll do some little reviews and recommendations. we’ll see. 

v. everyone. prepare yourselves. the best day of the year is fast approaching. sunday is….

THE TONY’S.

this is like my christmas, i swear to god. i am honestly so excited. the performances, the dresses, the tears during acceptance speeches. i love every second. i want to find/do one of those little score card things where you make predictions on winners and such. must find one tomorrow. hopefully i can find one and post it here. wouldn’t that be fun? 

i think so too. 

vi. due to the persuasion/peer pressure of a few of my friends, i think i’m going to start game of thrones. i’m scared. eeeeee. i’ll let you know how that goes. 

vii. must download the hands on a hardbody, kinky boots, and pippin soundtracks. must. 

(told you i love broadway.) 

viii. okay, so. let’s talk about dreams for a second. 

mine is that i want to be a journalist. i want to work for the new york times. little story time: when i went to new york over spring break, on the cab to the hotel from the airport, i saw the new york times building for the first time ever. i swear to whatever holy, higher power you believe, my whole entire being just lit up. i was definitely maybe crying–whenever i see/am in/leave new york, i cry; it just happens–at that point, and seeing that building just made me want it.  

i’m not someone who expects things to fall in my lap, so. i’m working for it. in fact, in a little more than two weeks, i’m going to brown university for a journalism summer program. this makes me a happy girl. three weeks in rhode island doing what i want to be doing. yes yes yes. i am very very excited/nervous/pleased. 

i’m coming for you, dream. prepare yourself. 

ix. recently, one of my best best best friends on the entire planet got a twitter. this is very exciting because she, sadly, lives about 3ish hours away. both she and i are very busy people and don’t talk as much as we should. but thanks to her twitter-getting, we’re able to talk more. in fact, we’re making plans to see each other at some point this summer. 

i’ve known her since the first day of forth grade, and she was one of those people who i just instantly clicked with. it’s so easy and effortless to talk to her (when one of us makes the effort). i truly miss her so much, and the fact that we are, for lack of a better word, reconnecting again makes me smile so much and warms my heart. 

x. have a nice weekend. 

🙂 

ps. xi. the title is from a song on the matilda the musical soundtrack, loud. it has absolutely no context in this post, as i’m sure you know, but it makes me happy and giggle and i like it. so. my title it is. 

in the slip of a bolt, there’s a tiny revolt.

attempting to start this post off right with a poem i wrote not too long ago for creative writing. i’m finding myself more as a poet than a fiction writer at the moment. i gotta say, i’m digging it at the moment. i think i’m getting better (i started off horribly. you don’t even want to see my first poems earlier this year. bleck.) which is awesome. anyway, our assignment was to write a poem based on/inspired by 13 ways of looking at a blackbird by wallace stevens which is really awesome and artsy. this is solely for a friend who said a previously posted poem was great, and not to toot my own horn, i love this. here’s my take:

13 ways of looking at serendipity

I. In between the moldy books, shifty eyes follow and look upon the letters to make sense of the word. Serendipity. 

II. I felt serendipitous. The noun was quite the fortunate discovery. 

III. It slips sweetly of my tongue. A silent secret. 

IV. A girl finds it, the happy, only by chance. She and her serendipity are complete. 

V. I love the sagacity, the shy smile. They quickly follow the passing of the pleasant. Slowly, steadily, I follow as well. 

VI. It’s a moment of magic, a second of serendipity. 

VII. How does it feel? The flash of sheer bewilderment? Is it as nice as it sounds, as it seems? 

VIII. I’m aware of the syllables fall apart. Ser•en•dip•I•Ty. Then rush back together to form a beckoning of lovely. 

IX. Each letter, so special, strings together in an unprecedented way. I and my serendipity, as happy as can be. 

X. The start of the sound, the crisp s, signal my zeal to be, to become, serendipity. 

XI. It is a special word. Not to be thrown around. So many other are—love, believe, trust. Treat this word with care. You must. 

XII. The tide turns. The moment is gone.

XIII. It was fleeting. For it never lasts. Congratulations, you’ve had a moment of serendipity. Perhaps one day, years from now, you shall have another. It is an art, unexpected and pleasant. Consider yourself serendipitous.

 

i. act 2.0 tomorrow. i just want a 30. i can do it, i can do it, i can do it. i’m totally going to write  motivational notes to myself on my test. can’t hurt, right? good thoughts are good and welcome, if you so desire to send them to me, dear reader. 

ii. because of its american opening yesterday, i listened to the matilda the musical obc yesterday and i. am. obsessed. the show, based on the book of the same name by ronald dahl, has been successful in west end for quite some time, so to america, it came. my three favorites are when i grow up, revolting children (which has the honor of being my act pump up jump on the drive to school tomorrow en route to the act. i think it’ll do the trick), and naughty, which i have on repeat right this second. 

the book (not the actual book, the musical theatre term) is adorable and cute and love love love. i mean, there are like 7 singing child brits. how does it get better?!?! i don’t know. that’s for sure. the lyrics are lovely. my favorite of which comes from naughty and is so motivational in my opinion: 

Just because you find that life’s not fair, it
Doesn’t mean that you just have to grin and bear it.
If you always take it on the chin and wear it,
Nothing will change.

…

But nobody else is gonna put it right for me.
Nobody but me is gonna change my story.
Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty.

the show seems lovely and peppy, as my mother would say, and oh my, i wish i can see it one day at the shuebert. here’s hoping it has a big, long, successful run. 

iii. it was a rough week. glad to see it end already. 

iv. tonight was a good night. i love/adore/am obsessed with my very best friend. she is divine, and i know she will see this. she and i aren’t sappy and gushy over our friendship like i am with some others, but that doesn’t mean i don’t value it so so much. she and i are kindred sprits, and in a place where everyone seems to be cogs in a machine of blah and boring, i’d say we’re lucky to have one another. we never ever seriously fight, and whenever we do hang out (often because she’s my best friend, okay?), i always have a ball. 

for pete’s sake, i gave the girl a tampon today. (to the mentioned bff: i had to mention this. please don’t hate me.) our lives are a compilation of awkward moments, and as much as i hate it, i love it. basically, we always agree, and gah, i know i just said we aren’t sappy and gushy, but that’s exactly what i’m doing right now. yolo. 

in summary–she is my best friend. i am so happy to get to call her that. her new bangs are adorable. i have nothing but love for her. 

v. ugh, don’t even get me started on last night’s glee. i haven’t watched it yet (which is as rare as a thornless rose for me), and i honestly don’t want to. why why why, glee? 

confession time. 

with how sloppy everything’s been this season, i have a theory. it is glee’s fourth season, and   i think it has senioritis (how do you spell this?). get it together, glee. i beg of you. 

vi. so excited for next week’s episode though. so much good good good stuff coming. 

vii. newsroom season two starts up july 14th. this is also bastille day. i’m going to throw a newsnight and french themed crossover party to commemorate this momentous occasion. want an invite?

viii. hands on a hard body closes this weekend, and i am sad. 28 previews and 28 performances. quite literally, it’ll be gone too soon. it seemed fantastic, even if it’s set in my home state. new material is so exciting, and it barely got a chance. sigh. happy trails to the amazing cast. how i wish i got a chance to see it. 

ix. lea michele tweeted two pictures of her (one with jon groff whom i ADORE) at runyon in la. i’ve hiked there with my sister. i’m like 94% sure i’ve sat on that bench where she took that picture with her leg all funky and flexible. (cory monteith, you lucky man.) (oh my god, did i actually just type that? oh my god.) nevertheless, she is perfect and i’m still freaking out. 

x. i should sleep even though i have infinite things to say. big day tomorrow. wish me luck.

until next time, dear reader.